How not to change a diaper

I would like to say that I am no dummy. I changed both of my brother’s diapers and I am not afraid to change more. So, when we got our first placement, a newborn and 1-year- old, I was not worried (okay, maybe a little). However, life usually finds a way to make you look silly and this was no exception.

My wife, Selina, and I were preparing to leave the house and were in a hurry. We were running late and our newborn had just gotten a diaper change. …Continue reading →

Fatherhood, where does it come from?


My wife babysits a friend’s son, who is 2 years old. When our son started to call me Dad not too long ago, our friend’s son did the same. I wasn’t sure what to do, and I also didn’t know how or if I should try to discourage him from saying it while also encouraging my son to say it at the same time.

This got me thinking, what makes someone a dad? …Continue reading →

Our 3-year-old foster daughter loves all things girlie

princessIf something is pink, purple, or sparkly, it has a princess or Hello Kitty on it she’s going to like it.

I have to admit I encourage this love of pink and sparkles, and princesses. I love watching Sofia the First with her and singing along with the songs. I love painting her nails and hearing her cheer about how “pink and sparkly” they are. I adore watching her dress up in her favorite princess (of the moment) dress as she sets up a tea party for us. …Continue reading →

As a foster parent it’s not uncommon to hear one of two phrases

It’s either, “You’re a saint!” or “You’re crazy!” 

Each time I hear these phrases I think to myself, “I’m really neither!”  A saint is a person who is officially recognized by the Catholic Church, as being very holy, because of the way he or she lives.  So, despite checking my voicemail for the last seven and a half years of fostering, there are no messages from the Vatican!

On the other hand, a crazy person is one who is full of cracks or flaws, unsound, crooked, askew, insane or mad. Again, each time we’ve opened our home and family to a child in need, I’ve never felt any of these characteristics.

…Continue reading →

Why I became a foster dad

The most common question I was asked when my wife and I became foster parents was HK“Why?” Perhaps this is because we are a very nosy, inquisitive and curious society. We get other questions too, such as “Are they twins?” This is always puzzling because our son is a 2-year-old bear cub and our daughter at 13 months is about the size and looks of a peanut. No matter what, it’s pretty clear that our children don’t exactly look like us – so everyone always asks, “Why?”

The answer to this question depends on which “why” is being asked. Why don’t you have your “own” kids? Why did you choose to foster? Why did you want kids? Why didn’t you ask for kids that were “more like you?” …Continue reading →

My son gets it

buttonsRecently, I found Kid Hero and foster care buttons on my son’s backpack. Unknown to me he found them in a package we received for referring new foster parents. It brought tears to my eyes to find these buttons on the backpack of my 9-year-old boy.

Today, he came running through the front door smiling ear to ear. He could not wait to tell me about the kids and teachers who asked about his buttons. …Continue reading →

Kids say the darndest things


My husband and I have been fostering for nearly 10 years. We have loved more than 30 children, and adopted 6 through our program. We have been blessed to be a multiracial family with Caucasian, African-American and Hispanic children.

Recently, for no particular reason, we have had a series of either Caucasian or Hispanic foster kids.

One day our social workers placed a beautiful 8 month-old African-American boy in our home. Our 6 year-old African-American son looked at the baby to ask, “Why his skin so dark.”  …Continue reading →

The thrill of a new foster child

family3The phone rings and I instantly recognize the number. As my heart begins to beat a little faster, the voice on the other line says, “I am calling about a potential placement.” My heart beats faster as I learn the details of this little one — knowing it doesn’t matter because I’m going to say, “Yes, I’ll take her!”

I hang up the phone and frantically begin to …Continue reading →