There’s no such thing as giving too much in foster care

A few weeks ago, we welcomed some tiny little baby feet into our home. These little feet and the adorable baby they are attached to caught us somewhat off guard. Instantly, we were thrown back into the world of bottles, diapers, and midnight waking, back into a family of seven with a mere couple of hours to prepare. I for one was very emotional with this placement knowing the pain that his momma was going through not being able to be home with her new baby.

Many of our friends and family showed support without hesitation. We had meals brought to us, loads of formula and diapers donated, clothes and blankets showed up. We even had help with some of the other kids during those first few days. There’s also my personal favorite, friends dropping buy with a big olecup of coffee! This was by far more support than we have received with any of the previous foster kiddos we welcomed into our home. 

To those who have supported us or other foster parents, I say, thank you. You have no idea how much a cup of coffee, or a pack of diapers means to us. It might seem like a small gesture to you, but to us it means that you are with us in a time when things are chaotic and we can sometimes feel alone.

We know that not everyone can foster, but everyone can do SOMETHING. Thank you to all of you who consistently do that “something” you can do.

While we did receive the most support we ever have when this new little one entered our lives, at the same time we received the least support we ever have from some who have previously come alongside us. There are friends and family who have not even taken the time to email or text to check in and some who have shown very minimal support in comparison to our first few foster kiddos we were placed with.

I know that for many of our friends and family we have crossed the line and become “that crazy foster family.” They understood us when we first said that we have a heart for fostering, and are getting licensed as foster parents. They understood when we said that we felt we can do more, so we are going to open our license up to another one. They even understood when we said that our daughter has a biological sibling who needs a home and we are going to provide that.

Yet somehow now we have reached that place where some of our friends and family think we have done too much. Too much? What is that?

Maybe for some too much is doing more when you know your family has so much more to offer. Maybe too much is welcoming two beautiful girls into your home only to say goodbye a few months later knowing they would forever be a part of your hearts and knowing that they are home where they belong. Maybe too much is keeping siblings together when they would otherwise grow up apart barely knowing each other. Or is too much our family – our children learning firsthand how to give and serve by giving all they have to kids they didn’t know before they walked through our door? If all this is too much, than it is my privilege to have given too much to the children that have come to us needing a safe place and anyone who comes through our door in the future.

So again, to those who do that “something” they can to support foster families like mine – thank you! Thank you a thousand times for being with us! To those of you whose support we have lost because you just don’t understand how we can keep doing more, know that this is our heart! Our heart is to give, to be a safe place for a child when we are needed, for as long as we are needed. It is our heart to see siblings grow up together. Question us, call us crazy if you must, but know for us crazy would be not doing something when we know we can do so much!

Charonne Ganiere Licensed foster parent Children's Wisconsin

Children’s Wisconsin plays a big part in finding foster homes and adoptive families for kids in Wisconsin. At any given time, 7,000 children are in foster care in Wisconsin. We offer a team approach, working together to support the best interest of children and their families.